You left on a night, in pain, almost too strong that you couldn't see or hear anything lucidly. I lingered around in your room, roamed around, not knowing what to say or do to stop your suffering. I cried when nobody was watching, I didn't want anyone to feel weak, weak like me. At some point, I gave up and started sobbing and I hated not being able to speak to you. I looked at you and fondled your pale forehead and said in a fragile quivering voice that you were going to be alright. Nothing in the world was more painful than watching you suffer. I was frightened.
Then you were taken to the hospital in an ambulance. I watched you through the long windows. You were nearly passed out but rambling something in pain. When the vehicle moved slowly, I prayed to God that please don't let this be the last time I could see you. But as always, my prayers were in vain.
I went home and prayed and wailed and sobbed under the shower, begging for a miracle. Nothing worked and I lost you in a week. Just like that. You shined upon me like the bright sun and someone turned that off mercilessly.
Now, it's been 2 months.
I keep myself busy indulging in things I was never good at, but no matter what, not a day passes without thinking about you. I want to scream at nothing but mostly I don't know what to do. I miss you and I want and don't want it to stop. All the memories etched on my heart, your voice, your smile, and the love. The love.
If only I could go back to April 13th.
Without my voice trembling, my heart shattering into one million pieces,
I would hold you tightly.
I would lie down beside you.
And that's enough.
That's enough.
A piece of my heart has been cut off, but like a phantom limb, the love and longing are hurting me.
Then you were taken to the hospital in an ambulance. I watched you through the long windows. You were nearly passed out but rambling something in pain. When the vehicle moved slowly, I prayed to God that please don't let this be the last time I could see you. But as always, my prayers were in vain.
I went home and prayed and wailed and sobbed under the shower, begging for a miracle. Nothing worked and I lost you in a week. Just like that. You shined upon me like the bright sun and someone turned that off mercilessly.
Now, it's been 2 months.
I keep myself busy indulging in things I was never good at, but no matter what, not a day passes without thinking about you. I want to scream at nothing but mostly I don't know what to do. I miss you and I want and don't want it to stop. All the memories etched on my heart, your voice, your smile, and the love. The love.
If only I could go back to April 13th.
Without my voice trembling, my heart shattering into one million pieces,
I would hold you tightly.
I would lie down beside you.
And that's enough.
That's enough.
A piece of my heart has been cut off, but like a phantom limb, the love and longing are hurting me.
